Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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