i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Randomize
