Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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