I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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