Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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