Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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