my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
