Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
