At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
