Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
