my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
