How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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