I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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