Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
