What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
