we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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