At least make sure they are 18
Why
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
