dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
