Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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