About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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