I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize
