And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
