My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
