tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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