Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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