If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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