Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
