And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
