they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
