no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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