Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize
