We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
