listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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