if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize
