i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
