He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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