She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
