these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
