I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
