I'll bet she douches with gravy.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
