lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
