so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
