So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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