I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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