There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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