my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Randomize
