He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
