i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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