I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
