I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Shame is for Republicans.
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